Why am I SO scared of Mediocrity?

Why am I SO scared of Mediocrity?

By : Yasmin Razack - limitlesswomen.ca

More and more I have noticed this phrase popping up around the Internet, “…do not fall into the trap of mediocrity…” It seems to be everywhere…or it seems to be what I am noticing more and more.

As a result the voice in my head screaming, “ YOU ARE BECOMING MEDIOCRE…QUICK DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT. NOW!”

Through an intense coaching session I realized that what drives a large percent of my behavior is this top fear of mine that screams I am becoming or “being mediocre.”

Yes.  I realized it is not a small but a HUGE fear of mine.

But want exactly does that mean?

Google gives the following definition:

Mediocrity ~ ordinariness as a consequence of being average and not outstanding, averageness, ordinariness, mundaneness, mudanity- the quality of being commonplace and ordinary.

I wonder how there is such a thing as being mediocre…like in comparison to what? For example I find almost everyone in my inner circle EXTRAordinary in some way…but that is because I know who they are. I have history and in someway they have touched my life in extraordinary ways, by virtue of who they are and who they have become to be in my life.

But I am not sure YOU or the ‘average’ person would find the same people I find EXTRAordinary.

And at the moment the two people that fascinate me the most are my children, Kamea (3 yrs. Old) and Khyam ( 18 mos.)

So where does this definition come from and more importantly why does it exist?

And why am I so obsessed with it?

Is there a fire burning inside of all of us to Stand Out? According to researchers like Marcus Buckingham there is a fire inside all of us- but what separates us from those who are and those who are not mediocre?

I absolutely love my job, in every way possible there is to love a job. I feel BLESSED to be working as a Manager of Global Citizenship and Equity Education- it is in fact my DREAM  (9-5) job.

On top of that I have Limitless Women ( side-business) – also a dream I worked super hard at to achieve and it feels fabulous to see it come to fruition.

And last but not least I have an adoring husband with two beautiful children. So this is not about complaining in any way where I am…but it is not where I am, but where I want to go that is the question.

According to Malcolm Gladwell and many other’s it takes you 10, 000 hours of doing something to achieve Mastery- which is what he claims Bill Gates, The Beatles and Steve Jobs did….but there was little if ANY references to women.

At all.

However I did read Shania Twian’s autobiography who claims she did her 10k hours as a young child so she could both help feed her family and her passion...her superstardom came later-at the time she had no kids.

So my question remains. How can you become a Master of anything as woman with a passion for family and motherhood? For women who feel responsible for being responsible and not neglecting their roles as mother, wife, daughter, sister, friend, colleague etc….what does becoming ABOVE average look like? Feel like?

Not being mediocre for me will come at a cost. In coaching we call it ‘switching cost’- in other words what would it cost me if I were to FULLY pursue what I wanted to achieve in life ….I would have to give up something or give something LESS attention.

Can’t do that right now.

I would also have to sacrifice a lot of things and/or ask others around me to sacrifice in order for me to pursue this burning desire to address this ‘ becoming mediocre” fear inside of me.

And I know I cannot make that decision now…but what I can do is small decisions along the way that lead me to my goals of being extraordinary.  What is always clear and should always be clear is my purpose in life- why I am here: that is what keeps me feeling okay for the moment. Because I know each day I can live out that purpose in all I do.

Yes there are MANY reasons why we are here, but discovering your LIFE PURPOSE allows you to truly live your life to the fullest daily and address any fears you may have…especially the number one fear in all of us “that you are not enough.“

Do you know your Life Purpose?

Yasmin Razack is a Personal + Professional Life Coach who works with women in transition to unlock their limitless potential in all aspects of life. For more information please visit limitlesswomen.ca or email her at yasmin@limitlesswomen.ca.

Miami Heat meets the Power of the Brain + Usain Bolt

Miami Heat meets the Power of the Brain + Usian Bolt

5 Things I want you to know about my Miami Trip

By:Yasmin Razack

limitlesswomen.ca

When I landed in the picturesque trendy city of Miami I had no idea how transformative the trip was going to be. I was leaving my 2 children for the longest time ever – 5 days, and I was to complete course on the Neuroscience of Change and Transformation. Something I knew nothing about.

The brillant Dr. Srini Pillay

The entire time I thought the MOST about Limitless Women, as it was a course focused on how to leverage brain science within the context of coaching.  After completing the course I wish EVERY women alive could understand how to utilize the power of the brain in order to embrace the very essence of what makes them unique and not only use this to their advantage but to work on eliminating very things that hold us back….from success.

One powerful thing that happened to me is that I was able to let go of my constant ‘obsessing’ about the kids; or I would argue unhealthy worrying about the children when I am not with them.  What I did do instead was focus on being present.

Fully present. And it felt good…REALLY good.

I did this using brain-based insights that worked to train my brain differently.

And it worked…I am not going to write “ I didn’t miss the kids….” But I will say the suffocation I normally feel being apart from them did not exist at all on this trip.

5 Key Insights were:

             1. "It is simply impossible to change without your brain changing. Good thing is that it can…but just because something can does not mean it will. That is why you live your life outside your capabilities.” - Dr. Srini Pillay

“     2. "Effective envisioning involves not just the ability to see things, but the ability to feel things as well. The brain is more likely to change when thought and emotion are aligned.”- - Dr. Srini Pillay

3     3. “Clarity of mind and intention are powerful partners especially when what is intended involves a leaning into action.” - Dr. Srini Pillay

             4. Things are often not as they are, but as you wish to see them.”

            5. "In order for people to great, they have to surrender to the power of their own resistance”  - Dr. Srini Pillay

What was the most incredible part is that were able to understand how these ideas work right away; we put them into practice in the course….using OUR OWN ISSUES!

I feel powerful beyond words with this new knowledge…!

Lastly, for the city of Miami you will never know what you will experience, who you will run into and the energy of this city is on another level.  It has its own unique flavour and style you just feel being there and going to its various attractions.

I had to go to the lobby for something at 2:00am and who did I happen to run into was that fastest man in the world: Usain Bolt himself.

My cousin Corrine, Usain Bolt and me in the Mondrian lobby

Super calm, cool and collected.

I was a blubbering fool fascinated by his dominance this past Olympics asking every question underneath the sun:

How did you do it?

You made it look so easy!

His response was simply, “Its all about winning.” Although he did reference the intense training, I thought about brain science once again. He has the ability to train his brain to a level of superiority and discipline to win: as most Olympic athletes do.  And we are all amazed by it…it is the very thing that separates us from one another.

How do you want to train YOUR brain to achieve excellence in life?

Yasmin Razack is a Personal + Professional Life Coach who works with women in transition to unlock their limitless potential in all aspects of life. For more information please visit limitlesswomen.ca or email her at yasmin@limitlesswomen.ca.

How did Felix Baumgartner’s space jump , a Woman from India on a Motorcycle and 21k Transform my Thinking in One Week?

How did Felix Baumgartner’s space jump , a Woman from India on a Motorcycle and 21k Transform my Thinking in One Week?

By: Yasmin Razack (limitlesswomen.ca)

Late last night in Toronto I was frantically driving behind a zooming motorcycle trying to find parking at my in-laws condo to pick up the kids after a birthday dinner for my husband – only to discover that the driver was an ‘older’ woman named Smiti Gupta from India. But for me that wasn't the best part...

It was her look of happiness, pure joy and infectious positive energy that amazed me.

Who doesn’t want that feeling of doing something you love, something that makes you feel so happy you could die right there in that very moment and feel good about how you lived your life. 

She LOVED riding this bike, and informed me she has been on motorcycles since 1986 in India. And nothing or no one was has ever prevented her from riding- and I believe nothing ever will.

As a (new) working mother of two I find it SO SO SO SO SUPER HARD not to find time to do the things that I love….but to discover NEW things that have the possibility to uplift me in ways I never thought possible.

Isn’t that living life to the fullest?

But I feel selfish. Mommy-Guilt kicks in…and then there is the TIME factor.

When? When? When could I possibly not only JUSTIFY this exploration but also how could I fit in self-discovery in the crazy schedule I currently have?

Like the rest of the world I also witnessed Felix Baumgarter jump from space and almost instantaneously out of sheer fascination I probably did what most people did.

I Googled Felix.                                                            

One line he said hit me like a ton of bricks.

He said this is most likely his last and final ‘jump’ and when asked why he put himself in such high situations of danger his casual response was, “what is life if you don’t set these goals for yourself ? What kind of life would I be leading?”

And I am not talking ‘bucket list’, I am referring to discovering the things that will unlock new levels excitement for life in your soul that leads you to: pure bliss.

This all being said, on Sunday October 14^th I completed my first half-marathon, 21 kilometres of non-stop running: a time of 2 hours and 4 min. I later found out I made it to the top 15% for my age and for the entire heat of half-marathon runners!

What? This from a woman that owns a maybe 2 sneakers and boxes of high-heels?

I DID set a goal for myself after my second child to run a marathon….he was born last May.

I put it off.

I put it off.

I put if off.

Then one random day during dinner I jumped away from the kids and husband and signed up for the Scotia BankMarathon on my iPad. Just like that. 

I have no idea where that motivation came from but the process of training and working hard to achieve something I HAVE NEVER DONE BEFORE became new and heightened source confidence and will power.

Pushing myself to achieve longer distances in my runs to a point where 10k became to feel like 5k and even lacing up to run after little sleep and a hard work day STRENGTHENED MY MIND TO BELIEVE IN MYSELF MORE.

I was amazed.  I was amazed at how powerful  and necessary it was to have positive, encouraging 'I believe I can do this' thoughts in order to keep going. For me this was transformational. 

It was super hard to fit in the runs as a full-time working mom, SUPER HARD to negotiate the time away from family, finding energy and motivation to run at the end of the work day before I pick up the kids- Sat/Sun early morning runs , trying to eat right most of the time etc. But it became such an important goal for me because of how quickly I saw the value in process of pushing myself to work hard in order to attain a a goal I had never accomplished before.

When I crossed that finish line I felt a sense of accomplishment I have never EVER felt before. Pure Joy. Bliss. Levels of energy in my body I didn’t even know I had…I am still basking in these feelings and what know for sure is that it has taken my confidence, strength and determination to MUCH higher level.

I feel more than ever, as women we need to discover our strength and build our confidence by setting what I like to call “Adventure Goals” in order to discover our true potential….what is your next AG?  

Gotta go..it's 1:25am and my son just woke up!

Yasmin Razack is a Personal + Professional Life Coach who works with for women in transition to unlock their limitless potential in all aspects of life. For more information please visit limitlesswomen.ca or email her at yasmin@limitlesswomen.ca.

Between Interruptions: Top 5 MUST HAVE Books for New + Young Limitless Mothers

Between Interruptions:

Top 5 MUST HAVE Books for New + Young Limitless Mothers

By: Yasmin Razack

limitlesswomen.ca

I read like crazy when I was expecting my first child, all about pregnancy, how to be a ‘yummy mummy’, sleep training…blah blah blah.

Then I had the child. BAM! My whole life changed on April 24^th 8:16pm when my first daughter Kamea was born.

I was so frustrated that there was no ‘book lists’ for new mothers, so below is a list of MUST HAVE books for new and young mothers…and the list may surprise you!

5. Between Interruptions : Thirty Women Tell theTruth About Motherhood  - Editor,Cori Howard.

Wow. This book blew me away. If you are a mom to be or new mom this book will give you an in depth insight to the challenges of motherhood. Remember Monika Deol from Electric Circus (hyperlink)? She has 4 kids now, and her story of walking away from it all amazed me- in addition to what happened to her at the airport with 4 kids in tow. From high-powered fashion designers to Aboriginal women who choose to raise their kids on the water, this book shares stories about every topic imaginable to mothers and it is not censored. GREAT read.

4. The Naked Mom:  A Modern Mom’s Fearless Revelations, Savvy Advice, andSoulful Reflections - By Brooke Burke

Remember the show Wild On ? Brooke Burke was the host of a show that had my dream job: travelling all around the world to showcase the best beach, adventure and fun each destination could offer. What you don’t know is they had to shoot several episodes of her top half only because she was pregnant! And she tells you how she brought along her baby everywhere while she did the tapings in remote places all around the world….incredible! I would recommend reading this book around a year or so after you had the baby or when you feel that you have somewhat of a handle on things. Brooke is a mother of 4 and I just loved how modern and savvy she was in every aspect of her life. She gives you excellent tips on how to keep a positive and healthy identity as a woman, a partner and a professional while being a great mother. Her advice is more than savvy…its priceless!

3. The Incredible Years: A Trouble Shooting Guide for Parents with Children Aged 3 to 8- By CarolynWebster-Stratton

We don’t have to go to any classes, take any courses to become a parent. One day it just happens and when my child turned 2 I WAS LOST! I told one of my colleagues with older children what I was going through and she highly recommended this book.

Don’t know if I would be here today writing this blog if I didn’t get this book. It is that good period. Get it when your child turns 1 years old so you are prepared, the strategies WORK and they are so simple.

Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child- By John Gottman

Also read this one cover to cover, great insights and good strategies for communication. How do you talk to a 2 year old? A 3 year old? Furthermore, how do you want your children to treat others? This book allows you to understand how you can build a positive character within your children. I use these strategies DAILY.

2.The Glass Castle – By Jeanette Walls

By far one of the most gripping, heart wrenching memoirs I have ever read. It left me speechless, I read it in one day. Stayed up all night Googling the author when I was finished and debated writing her, and even going to see her speak in person. Once you become a mom, everything you read is from the lens of being a mom. After reading this heartfelt novel you will lose the guilt of not giving your child vegetables every meal or thinking you don’t ‘do enough’ as a parent. It will teach you things about parenting that you would never EVER think of if you didn’t read this book. This book was an eye-opener and not a week goes by that I not reminded of what was said in The Glass Castle.

1.    TheBook of Negroes – By Lawrence Hill

I gave birth to my second son Khyam on May 5^th and 1:01pm in the afternoon and stayed up until 4:30am that same day to finished this book. I cried out loud at several points and will never forget how this book made me feel about being a mother….the deepest fears we have as mothers come true for the amazing woman telling the story in The Book of Negroes. This book is by far the best book I have ever read, OF ALL TIME. Reading it as a mother affirmed my belief that once you make a decision to become a mother NOTHING in life takes precedence over the force within you to always to love and protect your children. I am still not over it. You will be amazed at the tenacity and resilience of the mother telling this inconceivable story.

Books that almost made the list:

Battle Hymm of the Tiger Mother – Amy Chua

Secret Daughter –Somya Kishmore

Fabulousity – Kimora Lee Simmons

Baby Wise – Gary Ezzo

What books do you recommend for new and young mothers?

 Yasmin Razack is a Personal + Professional Life Coach who works with for women in transition to unlock their limitless potential in all aspects of life. For more information please visit limitlesswomen.ca or email her at yasmin@limitlesswomen.ca.